📩 When Half-Assed Efforts Lead to Half-Assed Results

Today we're doing something different—instead of dissecting a single email, we're conducting a full launch autopsy.

I'll show you two tragically underwhelming launch emails that should be studied as a masterclass in "how to ensure nobody buys your offer."

Then, I'll reveal one of my secret weapons for profitable launches (the "sublist" strategy), and even share a real example from one of my earliest successful launches.

Grab your forensic tools.

This is going to get good.

And I mean real good.

👎 The "Pathetic" Launch Emails (ORIGINAL) 👎

Email #1: The "Waitlist" Email

Hi

You deserve more than vague advice and "just deal with it."

That's why I created The Next Chapter Blueprint—a year-long coaching experience to help women feel empowered through perimenopause. Join the waitlist now and be the first to get early bird pricing and exclusive bonuses!

Simply reply to this email to join the waitlist and get more information!

Much love!

-Anonymous Writer

Email #2: The "Doors Open" Email

Hi !

The doors to The Next Chapter Blueprint are now open!

This isn't just another program. It's a safe space, a roadmap, and a year of transformation.

You'll get coaching, a workbook, live support, and the tools to feel like YOU again.

Registration is open here!

Feel free to reply to this email for more information!

XO

-Anonymous Writer

❌ Why These Emails Made Me Want to Cry ❌

Look, I'm not one to sugarcoat things, so let me be blunt: these emails scream "I don't actually care if you buy this or not."

This level of effort is like showing up to a marathon in flip-flops and expecting to win. It's almost disrespectful to the offer itself.

Let's break down why these emails are doomed to fail:

1. Zero emotional investment: Neither email tells a story or creates any emotional connection. They're drive-by announcements, not persuasive communications.
   

2. No sense of urgency: The phrase "early bird pricing" appears once with no specifics on when it ends or what the discount is. There's nothing pushing the reader to act NOW.
   

3. Feature vomit without benefit translation: "Coaching, workbook, live support" – cool, but what does that actually mean for me? How will this change my life?
   

4. Generic copy that could apply to ANY program: If you can replace "perimenopause" with "weight loss" or "business coaching" and the email still works, it's too generic to convert.
   

5. Complete lack of pre-selling: The first email should be building anticipation, not just announcing a waitlist. The second email acts like we've been hearing about this program for months when it was barely mentioned before.

This person clearly doesn't understand one of the fundamental rules of launching: the money is made in the pre-launch phase.

🤫 The Secret Weapon: The Sublist Strategy 🤫

Let me introduce you to one of my most powerful launch strategies: the sublist.

A sublist is a segment of your email list that has shown direct interest in your offer before it launches by opting in to a specific "waitlist" or "first dibs" list.

Here's why it works so damn well:

• It creates a psychological commitment before the sale

• It gives you a hyper-targeted group of warm prospects

• It allows for an "exclusive" pre-launch to your most interested subscribers

• It builds anticipation and excitement for the actual launch

• It gives you valuable data on interest level before you launch

The most successful launches follow this formula:

1. Build a substantial sublist (7-14 days minimum)

2. Launch one day early to this sublist with exclusive bonuses

3. Launch to the main list the following day

4. Send high-frequency, high-value emails throughout the launch period

Let me show you how to transform those pitiful emails into something that actually converts.

👨‍💻 How I'd Rewrite Email #1: The Waitlist/Sublist Builder 👨‍💻

Subject: Who I predict will be the last woman standing in perimenopause (and it ain't who you think)

"Oh God, I'm dying."

Those were the only words I could muster as I lay in a puddle of my own sweat at 3 AM, the sheets soaked through for the third night in a row.

My husband rolled over, half-asleep. "Maybe you should just deal with it? My mom said it wasn't that bad."

I wanted to smother him with a pillow.

"It's just part of being a woman," my doctor had told me with a dismissive smile the week before, prescribing me a sleeping pill and sending me on my way.

For two years, I'd been hearing the same garbage:

"Just power through." "It's natural." "Maybe try some yoga?" "Have you considered losing weight?"

Meanwhile, I was forgetting important meetings, snapping at my teenage daughter for breathing too loudly, and wondering if I was actually losing my mind.

The woman staring back at me in the mirror wasn't just tired – she was disappearing.

That's when I realized something that changed everything:

The women who actually thrive through perimenopause aren't the ones with perfect hormones, unlimited resources, or magical genetics.

They're the ones who refuse to accept the bullshit narrative that they should "just deal with it."

They're the ones who know exactly what's happening in their bodies (not the watered-down version from those cutesy infographics).

They're the ones who have a specific roadmap for navigating each symptom, each change, each challenge that comes their way.

For the past three years, I've been quietly helping women become THAT woman – the last one standing while everyone else is drowning in night sweats and anxiety.

And now, I've packaged this exact roadmap into a comprehensive year-long experience:

THE NEXT CHAPTER BLUEPRINT

This isn't just another "take this supplement and hope for the best" program.

This is a complete transformation of how you experience this phase of your life – from dreading each day to actually thriving through it.

I'm opening enrollment next Thursday (April 25th), but before I do, I'm creating a special "First Access" list for women who know they're ready for a different approach.

When you join this list (by simply replying "FIRST ACCESS" to this email), you'll get:

• 48-hour early access to enrollment before it opens to the public

• A special "First Access" discount of $500 off the regular investment

• Three exclusive bonuses that won't be available during the public launch

• A spot reserved for you (in case we hit capacity during the public launch)

But here's the catch – this "First Access" opportunity closes on Tuesday, April 23rd at midnight.

After that, you'll need to wait for the public launch on Thursday – and I can't guarantee there will be spots left.

So if you're tired of being told to "just deal with it"...

If you're ready to become the woman who thrives while others just survive...

If you want to rediscover the version of yourself that's been hiding beneath the hormone fluctuations...

Reply with "FIRST ACCESS" right now, and I'll add you to the list.

To reclaiming your power,

Anonymous Coach

P.S. The women who join the "First Access" list will also receive a private invite to my exclusive "Hormone Mapping Workshop" on Wednesday night – where I'll show you how to pinpoint exactly where you are in the perimenopause journey and what specific steps will make the biggest difference for YOUR unique situation.

This workshop won't be offered anywhere else, at any price.

Reply "FIRST ACCESS" now to claim your spot.

👨‍💻 How I'd Rewrite Email #2: The Launch Email 👨‍💻

Subject: The day I snapped and threw my husband's "helpful advice" out the window (literally)

If there is anybody I don't listen to about perimenopause…

It's my well-meaning but clueless husband.

God bless him, he tries. But when he suggested I try "thinking more positively" after I'd been awake for 72 straight hours with hot flashes, I actually took the self-help book he bought me and tossed it out our second-story window.

Not my proudest moment.

But that day marked a turning point for me.

I realized I'd been following everyone else's advice – my doctor, my friends, random internet "experts" – and none of it was working.

The supplements sat untouched on my counter. The hormones made things worse. The breathing techniques were useless when I was drenched in sweat at 3 AM.

So I did something radical.

I spent six months researching ACTUAL solutions that work. Not the watered-down crap in magazine articles. Not the oversimplified advice from doctors who spend 5 minutes with you.

Real, evidence-based strategies from researchers who specialize in women's midlife health.

And then I tested EVERYTHING on myself first. (I was desperate enough to be my own guinea pig.)

The results shocked me.

Within weeks, my hot flashes reduced by 68%. My brain fog lifted enough that I could actually finish sentences again. My anxiety attacks – gone completely. My relationship with my husband – salvaged (the book, however, was beyond repair).

That breakthrough system became the foundation of what I now call "The Next Chapter Blueprint" – and today, the doors are officially OPEN.

This isn't just another program where you get some PDFs and guided meditations and then you're on your own.

This is a comprehensive, year-long experience that includes:

• The Complete Perimenopause Protocol – my step-by-step system for managing EVERY major symptom (not just the ones doctors actually acknowledge)

• Bi-weekly coaching calls where we address your specific challenges in real-time (because cookie-cutter advice is what got us into this mess)

• The Hormone Tracking System that pinpoints exactly what's happening in YOUR body (so you can stop guessing and start addressing the real issues)

• The Relationship Rescue Framework for managing the impact on your marriage, family, and work relationships (because perimenopause doesn't just happen to you – it happens to everyone around you)

• Lifetime access to our private community of women who GET IT (because nobody should navigate this alone)

I've had women tell me this program saved their marriages, their careers, and in two cases, they believe it saved their lives.

The investment for The Next Chapter Blueprint is $2,497 – or 12 monthly payments of $227.

But if you're on the First Access list and enroll before tomorrow at midnight, you'll get:

• $500 off the full investment (making it $1,997 or 12 payments of $187)

• The Sleep Reclamation System (value: $497)

• The 30-Day Energy Reset Protocol (value: $297)

• The "Talk To Your Doctor Like A Boss" Script Templates (value: $197)

I should mention – last time I opened enrollment, all spots filled in 38 hours. With over 400 women on the First Access list this time, I expect we'll hit capacity even faster.

If you're ready to stop hearing "just deal with it" and start actually SOLVING the challenges of perimenopause, click below to secure your spot:

[YES, I'M READY FOR MY NEXT CHAPTER]

You don't have to white-knuckle your way through another night of insomnia, another day of forgetfulness, another moment of feeling like you're losing yourself.

There's a better way, and I'd be honored to show it to you.

To thriving (not just surviving),

Anonymous Coach

P.S. Still on the fence? I get it. This is a significant investment in yourself. That's why I've created a 60-minute masterclass called "The 5 Perimenopause Myths Keeping You Stuck" that might help you decide if this approach is right for you. You can watch it instantly here.

But don't wait too long – enrollment closes Friday at midnight, and we will sell out.

✅ Why These Rewrites Will Actually Convert ✅

These rewrites transform tepid announcements into compelling sales messages by following the principles I teach in my own launch campaigns:

1. They start with story-based emotional hooks that create immediate tension and recognition.
   

2. They address the specific emotional pain points of perimenopause beyond just the physical symptoms.
   

3. They establish credibility through personal experience rather than just making claims.
   

4. They create multiple layers of urgency – early access closing, limited spots, bonuses expiring.
   

5. They translate features into transformational benefits that show exactly how life will change.
   

The first email builds a sublist of highly interested prospects, and the second email capitalizes on that interest with a compelling offer that seems tailor-made for each reader.

📝 Want to See a Real Launch Campaign? 📝

If you're curious how I've applied these exact principles to my own launches, I've made one of my earliest successful campaigns available for you to study.

It's the exact sequence I used to launch "The Great Email Profit Writing System" to my list, which generated over $16k from a list of just 1000 people.

[CLICK HERE TO SEE MY ACTUAL LAUNCH CAMPAIGN]

Study it.

Model it.

And never send pathetic two-line launch emails again.

What To Do Next ⏩

• Want your email redone? Submit it here
  

• Discover the proven approach I follow to create and launch any digital offer to an email list. Go here.

• Forward this to someone who writes marketing emails
  

• Use your referral link below and get a friend to subscribe (you get rewards for doing so btw)

-Adrian “Launch It” Moreno

P.S. If you want to take this a step further and actually launch something successfully in a single weekend from your email list, I've put together something special. It's called "The 5k Weekend Launch System" – the proven approach I follow to create and launch any digital offer.

This is the exact system my students have used to:

• Generate $5k with two $2,500 clients from a list of just 86 people

• Add $6k in revenue while hanging out with family for the weekend

• Sell over $7k of a course priced at just $197 to a list of 337 people

[CLICK HERE TO DISCOVER THE 5K WEEKEND SYSTEM]